What Would Scooby Doo?

No credit. That’s what humans give us when it comes to our decision making capabilities. Why do I say this? Just look at this article for the latest example.

HILLSBORO, Ore. (AP) – Reasoning that if you build it, they will go, critics asked Hillsboro officials to take a fire hydrant painted as an American flag out of a dog park.

“That gallant dog[Hondo the deceased police dog the park was created in honor of] must be turning in his grave at the thought of the flag being desecrated every time a dog pees on that hydrant!” wrote Louanne Douris, a retired U.S. Foreign Service officer.

First off, Hondo would have approved of leaving messages at the hydrant. Second, he was cremated so he isn’t turning in any grave. Third precautions were taken to insure this situation wouldn’t take place…

Parks officials had thought of that problem. So the red, white and blue hydrant was on an 18-inch base, and “dog-unfriendly” shrubs were planted around its base – juniper and prickly barberry bushes.

And finally, they placed other fire hydrants in the area that are much more popular recipients of doggie messages.

Another hydrant, painted with images of Scooby-Doo and Underdog, was placed at ground level for the convenience of the dogs.

Believe me when I tell you that these two ‘heroes’ are anything but in the canine community. Sellout is the word that comes to mind and is the main reason this firehydrant is the AT&T headquarters of the canine crowd.

Insinuating a dog is unpatriotic is like implying a cat is fun to own.

UPDATE:

Read more

Stayin’ Alive

Yes, dogs can disco.

I don’t think John Travolta would approve, I know I don’t. The next fad for canines is dance camp.

He’s quick and elegant and oh, so light on his paws, the Fred Astaire of dancing dogs. Nobody cuts in when Ricky the Dalmatian is on the dance floor.

And nobody puts Baby in the corner.

“Dancers with Woofs K9 Freestyle Dance Camp” was reputedly the first of its kind in the region. It was a seminar and a celebration in which the handlers and their dogs learned all the right moves on the dance floor.

The activity, participants refer to it as a sport, bubbled up in the 1980s and by 1999 enthusiasts put together the World Canine Freestyle Organization. In freestyle dancing, handler and dog work to be creative and artistic, and just about anything goes as long as it’s safe. Heelwork-to-Music combines such elements as obedience and dance.

Doesn’t sound like too much fun to me but then again, this one time at band camp …

Whattsa Matta Foh You?

What are the chances this will last? Statistics say fiddy-fiddy.

Cynthia Klopfer threw a fairy tale wedding at her house for canine brides and grooms.

Klopfer, 37, hosted a “celebration of canine love and commitment,” this year’s theme for a local reunion of people who have adopted dogs through the Italian Greyhound Club of America Rescue. Two of Klopfer’s dogs, Isabelle and Buddy, were married. The bride wore a silk dress and the groom wore a bow tie.

Italian Greyhounds? Who was the best dog at this wedding, Rovah bag a donuts?

Klopfer is a single marketing professional who works from home. She lives with seven dogs — a three-legged great Dane named Ernie; a retired racing greyhound named Milli; and five Italian greyhounds: Bocelli, Joey, Lily, Isabelle and Buddy.

Off the record, Klopfer maintains that the biggest problems she faces when first adopting an Italian greyhound is to get it to stop using its paws when it talks.

For more information about Italian greyhounds and rescue, go to http://italiangreyhounds.org

Abe Vigoda Is Alive

McGruff the Crime Dog is still at it. Looking at the picture, I have to say that he’s a lot bigger than I remember him.

Although McGruff the Crime Dog has been helping people fight crime in their communities for more than 20 years, he recently joined forces with the Milpitas Police Department.

Over 20 years doing this, huh? He’s the canine version of Abe Vigoda’s character Fish in Barney Miller. How many crooks do you think a 140+ year old dog is going to capture? If you guessed none, give yourself a milkbone.

I’m Too Sexy Fur My Shirt

Not sure I want to take up this invitation.

The World’s Ugliest Dog wants you to join him for dinner

The Chinese Crested Chihuahua mix will be the featured star of a benefit dinner to support abused and homeless animals at 1 p.m. Oct. 7 at the Full Ho Restaurant in Clementon.

After seeing Elwood’s picture, my sister Copper initially answered an emphatic no to the invitation! But then she found out that Elwood is loaded with cash and is famous. Now she says it’s all about having a great personality and not necessarily good looks.

Hmmm, what if you got neither? I guess you’d end up like Britney Spears, the 2007 version.

When Sausage Dogs Attack

I don’t like to point out vicious dog attacks on my blog but this one needs to be highlighted. This wiener dog sounds more vicious than a pit bull…

The owner of an eight-inch sausage dog has been cleared of letting it run out of control in public place. Lucy, a dachshund, was alleged to have bitten neighbour Shawn Anderson outside his flat in Gosforth, Newcastle.

The dog approached Mr Anderson, who lived in the flat below, ran round his legs and, according to him, nipped him on the ankle and bit his jeans.

Did you read that? He was nipped on the ankle! Ouch!

Asked how he felt after the dog attack, he told magistrates: “I was really, really angry. I was more or less inconsolable.”

You know what makes me inconsolable? Seeing how sausage dogs are made.

Gimme An O

A close call for a couple of friends:

BRANFORD – No one was injured in a fire that destroyed a caretaker’s apartment at the U-Store-It storage facility on Cedar Street Wednesday night, including two dogs saved by firefighters’ quick work and some specially made canine oxygen masks.

The masks were donated to the Fire Department two years ago by a Norwalk-based chain of pet boarding centers.

The man who lived in the apartment was able to get out, and firefighters were able to rescue two dogs, Pepe said.

The man was able to get out but the dogs needed to be rescued? Hello, anyone in this article seem just a little too self involved?

The animal oxygen masks, donated by Best Friends Pet Care, “were very useful,” Pepe said.

Apparently not chosen for this rescue was Bubble Boy’s Low Flow Animal Oxygen Mask which has “Not Very Useful” stamped right on the front.

Deb Bennetts, who works at Best Friends Pet Care’s Norwalk headquarters and is in charge of the “Cause for Paws” program, which has supplied more than 350 resuscitation mask sets to more than 100 fire departments across the nation so far, said she was glad to see that they had done some good in Branford. She said community members who contributed to buy the masks in Branford and other communities also would be pleased to know it.

The masks, which come in three sizes, currently cost $55 per three-mask set, she said. Best Friends generally matches contributions from pet lovers in the various communities, she said.

I wonder whether these masks are as cumbersome as my sleep apnea cpap machine ?

For more information on how you can help, go to www.bestfriendspetcare.com/causeforpaws/index.cfm.

Meet Me At Saks and Fifth Ave

I’ll be honest, I’m not much of a shopper. However, if the shopping experience entails everything that this article describes, I’m willing to revisit my stance.

Three floors of the upscale store [Saks Fifth Avenue] were filled with festive pink paw prints and free goodies for shoppers and their canine companions.

On the main level, pooches were treated to spa treatments and gourmet vegetarian eats compliments of Old Town’s Barkley Square. Lined up between designer purses and shoes, canines of all shapes and sizes indulged in aromatherapy, an aromatic “fur breeze” (a spa mist) and Barkley’s signature PAW-dicure nail treatment. The Doggie Bar featured treats handmade by Barkley Square and a team of local bakers, who put in extra hours to make enough nibbles for hundreds of hungry dogs.

A friend of mine went to the bar after his spa treatment. He said I didn’t miss much; apparently it was filled with a lot of dogs that were coyote ugly. The aromatherapy wasn’t so much therapy as it was just a pungent aroma of cabbage stew. And it turns out the fur breeze was just a bunch of grown ups squirting dogs with their Super Soaker squirt cannons.

Frankly I’m glad I stayed home and played World of Warcraft instead.

Have A Coke and A Smile

So, do dogs smile you ask? Well here’s an article that discusses that age old question.

The canine smile: It’s as talked about as Mona Lisa’s, and just as intriguing.

I don’t know who this moaning Lisa is but I assure you my smile is better.

Scott Vogel has worked with dogs for 25 years at the Delaware Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. As the society’s director of humane education, he said he’s seen expressions he’d call “a happy face.”

I’ve heard it from good sources that the happy face comes after the happy ending.

Worf, a “small but mighty” Shetland sheepdog, used to mug for the camera when he was photographed in the costumes he wore as a therapy dog.

Oliver, an English bulldog owned by Tara Barrett, of Newark, smiles when he goes to the beach because he loves the water.

“Tennis balls are her[Lisl the Lab's] passion,” said Ortega, who lives in Lincoln Park, Pa. “And ice cream. She loves those peanut butter Frosty Paws.”

As Young said, “If one end can show they’re happy, why not the other end?”

Young is wise. She must have seen some of the smiles I’ve produced from my other end.

Wigging Out

I hope my parents don’t read this article. I sense further humiliation for the canine community.

In case you or your dog missed the news the other day, the must-have accessory for canines debuted this month at the New York International Gift Fair. They were wigs. Wigs for dogs.

Hair for dogs. Not to be confused with hair of the dog. As in fetching dos for dogs with fur coats and their owners, possibly in fur coats, too, who love to pamper them.

“I looked at it and I said, `Why not wigs for dogs’?” [Creator Ruth] Regina explains.

I look at it and say, “Why not a round rubber room for Ruth?”

If there are any canine hackers out there, feel free to work your magic on http://www.wigglesdogwigs.com/.

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