Woman Chooses Crocodile over Husband

It’s pet adoption month!!

I think we should all take the time to thank our owners for doing the right thing by bringing unbridled joy and love into their homes by adopting us.

I  might crack a joke or two about my old man and his owner, but without the two of them I’d be pushing up daisies in the backyard of some upstate NY shelter.

If you didn’t know, in the winter those daisies are a bitch to push up.

“So, thanks folks for being there when it counted. But, don’t sit on your laurels; run to the pet shop to resupply our depleted store of Frosty Paws.  It’s the only way to show you truly love me.”

People are suckers for cuteness and will adopt just about anything. And when I say just about anything I mean it, as the Metro UK discovers.

There were nothing but crocodile tears for Vicki Lowing when she chose Johnie over her husband, Greg.

When Greg issued his 52-year-old wife with an ultimatum, it’s me or him, she opted for the younger one in her life: Johnie – her 13-year-old pet crocodile.

‘Husbands can look after themselves but my crocodile can’t make meals,’ she said.

Johnie was just a baby when it was left on the doorstep of her home in Victoria, Australia, in 1996 and she treated the croc like a son.

Ironically, since her husband left her in 2005, she has discovered Johnie is a girl.

Every one knows May-December romances never last, especially if it is a girl – crocodile one.